Behavior Is Communication: Preparing Students for the Holiday Season

There’s a pre-holiday phenomenon I’ve come to recognize over the years as an educator and parent.

Many of my students used to go "home for the holidays" to environments with little or no food, guidance, or even a stable home or parental presence. As a teacher, I spent those last days before the break ensuring they had what they needed—food, clothing, and a sense of safety. For many, school was their refuge, and the thought of losing that safe place for three weeks was terrifying.

Their behavior reflected this fear. At the time, I was too focused on meeting their immediate needs to think deeply about the underlying reasons behind their actions. However, this awareness has resurfaced in recent days as I observe my own 11-year-old twins.

My son, who often experiences heightened anxiety when things go wrong, recently had a meltdown over a rainstorm that caused a small leak in our house. Meanwhile, my daughter has been retreating into books, avoiding the world entirely. His behavior communicates his excitement for our upcoming trip to Japan mixed with nervousness about change. Her behavior communicates anxiety about traveling, as it disrupts her sense of stability.

As educators and parents, what can we do when our students display heightened emotions or behaviors as the holidays approach? Here are three practical strategies, inspired by advice from The Alexander Youth Network, Child Mind Institute, Seattle’s Child Magazine, and my own experiences as both a parent and educator.

1. Stick to a Routine

Routine provides stability, especially during times of change or uncertainty. While it’s hard to maintain a full routine when traveling or during school breaks, small, predictable elements can go a long way.

When my oldest son (now 20 and playing college baseball) was young, we created a “flight schedule” every time we traveled. Together, we wrote it out: first, have a snack; then, play; next, eat lunch; watch a movie; and finally, take a nap. It may sound overly structured, but it helped him feel secure and gave him something to anticipate.

Teachers can apply this concept by helping students create similar schedules for their time at home. A simple, visual daily plan posted on the wall can reduce anxiety and keep them grounded.

For struggling readers, maintaining a consistent practice schedule is especially important. As a reading specialist, I often hear parents say, “We’re going on holiday, so we’ll take a break from sessions.” However, virtual learning makes it easy to stay consistent, even during trips. Just 30 minutes, three days a week, can make a big difference.

Older struggling readers, in particular, benefit from continued practice. When they pause for weeks, they often spend additional time trying to relearn skills when they return. Instead of framing breaks as a time to stop, think of them as an opportunity to build habits. Consistency leads to faster progress—and it’s not forever, but the results will last.

2. Talk Openly

Behavior is communication. Students often express their emotions through their actions, especially during times of transition. Taking time to talk openly about their feelings is crucial.

School breaks often bring changes in schedules and family dynamics. For expat families, visiting relatives can stir strong emotions—love, worry, and sometimes even tension. Encourage students to share their thoughts and concerns, whether they’re feeling excitement, fear, or a mix of both.

Creating a safe space for this kind of dialogue builds trust and emotional well-being. Teachers can do this in the classroom by setting aside time for journaling or small group discussions. Parents can encourage open conversations at home during quiet moments.

It’s important to respect a student’s boundaries. If they’re not ready to talk, don’t force it. Instead, find alternative ways to help them manage their emotions, such as engaging in anxiety-reducing activities like mindfulness, drawing, or reading.

3. Create a Safe Space

Not all students have a secure home environment, and the holidays can amplify feelings of instability or isolation. A designated safe space—whether physical or emotional—can make a significant difference.

I vividly remember a student who returned to visit my classroom years after leaving our school. He wasn’t even a current student anymore, but he needed somewhere to feel safe. His apartment life was unpredictable, and he sought refuge in the familiarity of the school.

For some students, the holidays are overwhelming because of social media pressures to have a “perfect holiday” or the absence of what others seem to enjoy. Teachers and parents can create safe spaces where students feel supported. This might be a quiet corner filled with comforting items, a calming sensory room, or simply a designated time to relax and decompress.

Having a safe haven helps students process their emotions and regain a sense of control during chaotic times.

In Summary

As the holiday season approaches, remember that behavior is communication. By sticking to routines, encouraging open dialogue, and providing safe spaces, we can support our students through transitions and help them navigate the emotional complexities of this time of year.

Whether you’re a teacher or a parent, these small actions can make a big impact—ensuring students feel seen, heard, and supported as they step into the holiday season.